Dessert Storm takes on the London to Brighton

The London to Brighton British Heart Foundation 54 mile on-road race is the UK's largest charity bike ride with 27,000 riders cycling the scenic route between London and Brighton on the south coast.

Since 1980 when the BHF first became involved with the London to Brighton Bike Ride, over 650,000 riders have taken part in the event and more than £40 million has been raised to help fund pioneering research, patient care and vital information. (Please click on the picture above to donate). This year team Dessert Storm – catch phrase ‘Bring on the pudding!’ took up the challenge, made up of 5 ‘Dustbadgers’: AD Matthews, Charlie Gough, Jenny Moran, Charlie Sims, Ed Hazeldean and a coupla extras (and initial organisers) Jules (Prouting) Matthews and Gill Salisbury.

We met on mass in London on the Saturday night and so began a frantic attempt to prepare for the following day. Last minute bike repairs were made, race cards lost and found, team flags named and attached to bikes, tubes blown (way to go AD) and debates over the weather forecast (how can the BBC give three different forecasts in one day!??) and what to take by way of waterproofs were had before we all uploaded and headed for the pub for some quality English grub.

Rising bright and early on Sunday morning we made a good start from Jenny’s flat in Camberwell and commenced our 3.7 mile warm-up ride (courtesy of Charlie-man’s GPS) to Clapham Common. This took us through the surprisingly quiet streets of London picking up unknown competitors on route swelling the ranks of the relatively small peleton. Despite the knowledge of many miles ahead some play cycling was had to get to the grounds. Once at Clapham Common it became obvious that we, along with about 20,000 others were starting in staggered rows from 7.30am onwards which made the opportunity for a quick toilet stop in bushes as opposed to queuing for the portaloos an attractive option. Then time for a quick team photo before heading toward the start line.

Team Dessert Storm: bring on the pudding!

We stood in the 8.00am queue full of anticipation for the ride ahead, proving too much in some cases when more than half the group succumbed to the portaloos leaving AD, Jules and Jenny holding 7 bikes. Finally, the race started and it was all go. Or should have been but tens of thousands of people trying to get through the streets of London, on bikes, close together, with SPDs and lots of starts and stops meant that it took us around 1 and a half hours to cover the first 10 miles to the outskirts of the big city. Just like being stuck in stop start traffic on the M25 but worse as the danger of crashing is so much greater! Luckily the group emerged from the mass of cyclists together, frustrated but unscathed, expecting a freer ride now the city was left behind. Despite upholding the great English tradition of keeping to the left if going slowing (think motorway and London tube stations!) it was still frustratingly congested and hard to pass slower riders without cunning, aggressive (and sometimes, lets admit it, showy) riding (no names mentioned). We hit the first hill and as more and more people got off to walk so the congestion worsened and formed a bottleneck. Jules and Charlie took the lead, attacking the hill not at speed but with guile and gradually gained on the lead police car but despite their best efforts became stuck behind an impenetrable wall of riders. Not far behind Charlie-girl was pumping up the hill when a man in front of her stopped suddenly, with nowhere to go but down she fell with the bike, the first (but not the last) Dessert Storm casualty of the day. Bouncing back up she was at the top in no time and the team headed for hill no 2. This was reached at the 20 mile mark and once again the road became thick with riders. Once at the top Dessert Storm and the rest of the riders came to a grinding halt as an accident impeded any further progress for the next half hour.

‘Riders take a break whilst waiting for traffic to clear.’

Making the most of the sun, the team members (minus AD who was stuck somewhere up ahead) chatted, applied sunscreen, snacked and made friends with the random cyclists surrounding them. Stayed away from the old guy with the big sidies and the blow up doll though! AD eventually made his way to the team and the crowd started to move forward, passed the Dog and Duck pub. At around the 25 mile mark we flew passed the Burstow Scouts and on toward the second biggest hill of the ride, Turners Hill, at the top of which marked the half way point.

At the top of the hill we were met by Ed’s Mum, Dad and sister who had a spot on the green by the Lancing Brass Band with a prime time view of our fellow racers including punks, the pink panther, Fred Flintstone, Batman and the 118 118 men. We enjoyed a quick lunch in the rapidly fading sun and contemplated whether or not we’d get to Brighton before the forecast heavy showers set it in. Jules and Gill decided their KDC MBC luck would hold and rain would be avoided. So we took off with minds set on completing the last 24 miles and the giant obstacle that is Ditchling Beacon.

After an 8 mile blitz we passed the entrance to the Ardingly Showground and continued to push on stopping only for a water refill. Jules took on board another 2 litres after emptying her camelpack and whilst the other girls pushed on towards Ditchling, the boys waited (by accident only a few metres in front of 4 official photographers stationed on the gentle rise leaving Lindfield). After a few minutes we started to help the camera men and women out by making jokes to the traffic as they rose out of the picturesque village.

Once Jules rejoined the team, the remaining foursome took the chance to use their speed and try their overtaking skills on the hundreds of riders surrounding them. Ad & Jules tried slip streaming one another to save valuable energy for the last slog! Soon the group were up together again and closing in on their pre-arranged Ditchling break.

We pulled of the road and enjoyed a break from the saddle before planning our tactics for the ascent and descent before meeting the city limits. The Ditchling Village rest and refreshment stop had all the usual treats, portaloos, drinking water, bike mechanics and resting space in the gardens of a beautiful private dwelling opened up by the owner who welcomed everyone into the garden and was happy to have several hundred strangers spread out across his manicured lawns.

The time had come and the ascent had to be nailed, so we mounted up and started pumping those peddles, most of us chose to stay right and ride as fast as we could overtaking where possible. ‘The Beacon’ had been billed as ‘nothing we had ever summitted before’ due in the main to the sheer number of riders and more particularly walkers choking the narrow road. When the 400m rest stop sign was passed it spurred us on and when the PA system could be heard clearly enthusing the riders to keep going the ascent was basically over and gave us time to lower the heart rates, calm the breathing and take in the panorama. Not that this was a race, but the order was Ed, Ad, Charlie Man, Jules, Gill, Jen and Charlie Girl. We regrouped and started the long descent toward the finish, Charlie Man and Ed streaked away whilst AD was looking back the other way, leaving the local yokel in their wake. It took the next 10 minutes of flat out peddling by Mr. Matthews and good luck at the traffic lights for the 3 boys to be in convoy once again. The last section along the half open roads through Brighton was a little interesting as the group were more used to non-traffic routes, so the boys tried their hands at lane hoping and white-lining between the steady and stopped traffic on the busying roads.

In sight of the finish and Ad faked a sprint then sat back in the saddle, but it was too late and Charlie and Ed zoomed away once again crossing the finish before jamming the anchors to receive their medals in efficient BHF organised fashion.

The group re-gathered and beat their way through the thousands of finishers and on lookers between Madeira drive and the Beach towards the fish and chip stands for a well earned dinner, however the weather was turning sour and the group decided to head for the bus and get back to the big smoke! This seemed to be going well and with bikes carefully bubble wrapped and in the truck and tired bums on the coach seats we were happy… Then after being stationary in Streatham for 25 minutes, the driver announced that a tube station fire had caused the hold up and was unlikely to be cleared for an hour at least, so we took the option to off load 100 passengers and bikes and ride the remaining 5ish miles back to Jenny’s flat!

Charlie Man off-loading!

Ride Elevation (click to enlarge):

If you think Dessert storm have earnt their pudding
you can add to the value raised on behalf of
the British Heart Foundation by clicking HERE!

(Posted by: Ad)

Y Ddraig Goch Ddyry Gychwyn

After competing in the Helly Hansen adventure race the previous week, and still up for more challenges, John and Jon decided to head off to sunny Wales (well that’s what BBC weather site forecast) with Mrs John to tackle what has been called Mountain bikers Nirvana, Afan Forest Park. Concerned for the fearsome reputation of the Gaelic tribes (Twll dîn pob Sais! Ed.) we thought it best to go up in force, so teamed up with a posse that Ad and Ju had put together. With bikes prepared, Vince the camper van loaded with provisions and sufficient nutrition for the forthcoming assault (Al would have approved of the energy bars and drinks that J & J had prepared, but not the choice of music that accompanied the journey) the trio headed off on Friday night to Devizes to rendezvous with TCA veterans Ad and Ju.

Once ensconced in their house, having eaten and drunk Ad and Ju out of house and home, we went to bed at a reasonable time, as an early start was needed to get to Afan for a 10am start the following day.On arrival in Wales (just over the Severn Bridge) guess what..? It was raining! As we headed to Afan the rain got steadily worse. On arrival at the Glycorrwg campsite in Afan Park, we met up with the other intrepid adventurers: Scott the single speed king; Charlie Boy; Charlie Girl and Ed. After some debate the group split into 2, with Ju's heading off to the main park centre to meet with 3 more riders, where an assault on the “Wall” trial took place. The rest of us then decided to attack the infamous “Skyline” trail, or at least part of it as the weather was truly disgusting.

Croeso i Gymru

In for a penny and in for a pound, Mrs John decided that she too would come with us , on the basis that apparently after a fairly short but technical start the trail became easier. It should be pointed out at this stage that the only “serious” off road riding Mrs John had done up to this was some single-track riding in the relatively flat Thetford Forest, two weeks previous. The start was extremely technical due in part to its design, route, the presence of lots of boulders, tree roots, switchbacks and extent of the vertical ascent, but the extreme wet also added to the difficulty. After what seemed an age and with the majority of the group having to wait for the struggling but determined Mrs John (at this stage let’s introduce her real name - Emma) and her concerned (and feeling very guilty for getting her into this) husband, we arrived at the top. (it should also be added that although at times Em’s sense of humour failed, at no times were there any expletives or threat of divorce mentioned, unless that was they were under her breath).

Emma (centre) , still smiling!

The trail then switched on to mixture of forest fire break tracks, single track, with some spectacular downhill’s and allegedly some equally spectacular views over the Welsh hills (well that’s what Jon told John!), but being up so high and that we were in the rain cloud, this could not be validated. Due in part to the time it had taken and the fowl weather conditions the group decided to take one of the short cut routes back to the start. Up to this point the intrepid seven had suffered a number of falls, but Em was to suffer one which prevented her from riding further (it’s not so easy steering when one arm refuses to play). Fortunately a jeep appeared soon after Em’s fall with a very helpful couple of guys in who were doing a reckie for a forthcoming RAC rally in the park. Em and her bike were loaded into the Jeep for a trip back to the campsite (with mobile phone to let us know she had arrived safely). Joking aside the guys were very helpful and went out of their way to help so John owes them a debit of extreme gratitude. On the way back down to camp they gave Em lots of useful info about the area, think they were worried about her going into shock so just kept on talking to her (sometimes in Welsh). The infamous 6 continued onward - tackling an excellent, but technically and physically demanding downhill section - back to the site. The excitement for the day was not over; with several of the group suffering from falls, and one puncture, but all eventually made it back down in one piece. Back at the campsite the bikes were all jet washed down, the riders put themselves through cold showers (they were supposed to be hot, but the water tanks could not cope with the volume of people needing showers that day…still charged 50p for the privilege)!

In the Touchdown Café the group tucked into some excellent cakes and hot drinks, and collectively decided that we would call it a day and head back to their respective homes. The weather forecast for the following day was as bad, the campsite was looking like a water meadow, plus the promise of warm beds, the thought of a lie in (plus the extra hour in bed due to change to GMT), Sunday papers, Sunday roast, etc etc (you get the idea) all contributed to the decision. Vince was packed up with soggy clothing and tired, cold riders (John, Jon and Em). We set off home, arriving some 3.5 hours later, in time for Jon to get home to order his takeaway curry. Afan park offers an extremely diverse range of trails, all of which clearly have been thought through and are well maintained. The campsite at Glycorrwg offers a good site with, showers, an excellent café open to 10pm and a very good mountain bike shop. Despite the weather and difficulties encountered, John and Em were very happy to be asked along, as the group were all very friendly, helpful, and patient, and despite all there was still an excellent sense of humour present. Ad and Ju’s hospitality was much appreciated on the Friday night so we will hopefully be getting back to Afan at some stage next year, but better prepared next time (including first aid kit and strong painkillers)…and hoping for some good weather (Don't bank on it - it is Wales after all! Ed.)

(Posted by: John)

The Chichester Challenge 2007

Understanding that endurance sport is all about preparation Al was woken by his alarm at 05:45 this Sunday morning: After weeks of hard training and a strict diet he had only to complete the essential last-minute 'carbo load' before the event. A customary breakfast of Poweraid sports drink, cereal and the all important banana were consumed to provide energy and hydration for the day ahead. A few miles away John H was going through a similar routine: making up his favoured SIS performance drink to replace lost electrolytes and fluid on the course, and packing his precious GO Gel into his back pack. Final tweaks were made to equipment, essential tools and spares were checked (and re-checked) and performance clothing and lucky socks (set aside some days before) were donned with anticipation, before bikes were loaded into cars for the journey to the long-awaited City of Chichester International Challenge.

It was with with some surprise that Al found Jon P still asleep when he arrived at his house at 07.30. Hurriedly getting up and throwing on some clothes to answer the door, Jon gulped back half a cup of tea while trying to locate the various basics required for the days ride. He was almost ready as John H and then Jerry swung into his drive looking tense. We all mumbled our hellos and nervously readied for the off under the thick grey clouds - the weather forecast was foreboding - cool, overcast conditions were predicted with the threat of thundery showers looming, in total contrast to the searing heat of the previous year's event.

We made the short, familiar trip through the city centre to the start of the course in Oaklands Park (Map 1, SU862054). Shortly after registering our entries and picking up route maps we were joined by established Associates Ad and Ju who arrived with Ed and Charlie, veterans of a previous campaign. The reunion and the prospect of the highest TCA turnout in history lightened the mood. Ad showed off the latest tweaks on the ex-Billy-Bob machine - shiny new hydraulic disc brakes would get their first run-in today! After some neglect though Ad's forks were running quite flat so Al commandeered a fork pump from one of the gear stands to adjust the pressure [For future reference: 50 psi in each leg]. Charlie showed off his new GPS unit and was nominated as Route Calibration Officer by Al, who realised that his was still at Jon P's house. Debates about whether or not to wear waterproofs were the topic of conversation, although the weather was still holding out.

Team TCA '07 (from left):
John; Al; Jon; Ju; Ad; Ed; Jerry; Charlie

Before long we were lined up by the officials and set off to the sound of the air-horn. 300+ cyclist on machines - ranging from top-of-the range models with carbon composite frames, to basic Halfords mountain bikes (and all points in between) - crossed the start line. Al took off first, slipstreaming a couple of hardcore off-roaders, followed by Jon, then Jerry, then John, all adopting a maverick approach. The peloton of Ad, Ju, Ed and Charlie brought up the rear, commendably bringing a team ethos to the event, but never to be seen again by the mavericks that day.

Heading due north and climbing gently out of Chichester Jon P finally caught Al just before the first checkpoint (SU858122). The sharp descent approaching West Dean and Jon's Fumbling to find his checkpoint card meant Al was away from the checkpoint first. His lead was short-lived however as, first Jerry and then Jon caught and overtook him on the punishingly steep ascent out of the village (Map 2). Al managed to hold onto Jon until the next serious ascent through Westdean Woods towards the South Down Way, as the sun came out and the temperature rose contrary to the forecast. The Mavericks were again separated for a time; Jerry would stay out in front for the rest of the day.

Approaching the second checkpoint (SU849171) a speeding, lycra-clad elite rider abruptly announced his intention to overtake Jon on a fast downhill section. Jon allowed himself a wry smile as the rider got past but then hit a rut and was catapulted over the handlebars and head-long into a barbed-wire fence. Only his pride was dented thought Jon, but Al caught up with (who he presumed was) the same rider a few minutes later at the first checkpoint trying to beat a huge buckle out of his front wheel; the day was over for this competitor.

Towards South Harting from the Downs

Al eventually caught Jon again on the ascent to Harting Down. Al figured that he was now in his stride since Jon is usually stronger going up hill. It was only later that Jon explained he had paused to take a few snaps with his new camera. Nevertheless the pair stayed together (primarily due to gremlins in Jon's rear mech.) all the way through to the third checkpoint at the QE park above Buriton. The pair seemed to settle into a more relaxed pace and even stopped for a snack (below), sitting on their customary log (SU765192). This year Al's snack of choice was the highly ethical Chocolate and Raisin GeoBar while Jon favoured an Alpen Nutty Chocolate 'Groove' Bar, for two years in a row Jon again seemed to have selected the more palatable choice of sustenance.


Having remounted it was only a short spin to the next checkpoint (SU733198) where they got the cards stamped for the third time and took on board some water. The pair were closely followed by John H who looked grateful for the refreshment. The three set off together to start the pleasant down-hill road-based section of the route towards Huckswood Lane. It was around this point, as we headed off-road again, when Jon P started paying for his scant regard to basic nutritional requirements earlier in the day; he was complaining of cramp in one leg as the sun beat down on the sweating competitors. Jon took time out to nurse his muscles while John H and Al continued without him bound for the forth checkpoint at Stoughton (SU801115). Jon P caught up briefly while the other two chatted to a collection of riders gathered at the checkpoint, one being patched up by another after a nasty-looking leg injury. However, after a brief flat road section out of the checkpoint, Jon P was suffering again on the long ascent towards Kingley Vale. John H seemed to be experiencing the complete opposite - fueled on by his SIS energy products - he produced a reserve of energy and strength for the climb. John and Al stayed together for the remainder of the ride: the descent towards Chichester; through the fifth and final checkpoint (SU834083); down the winding country lanes to the outskirts of town and over the finish line back at Oaklands Park, where we could finally catch up of the progress of others and tales of crashes we had collectively witnessed on our way round.

Thankfully we had all avoided major incident although Ed (the only one of us with un-padded shorts) was apparently complaining of severe saddle-soreness towards the end of the ride. This was exacerbated by the fact that his legs tired and he had no choice but to remain seated. His companions in the peloton reported that he seemed to be grimacing with pain for a large part of the ride and was particularly grateful for any opportunity to dismount along the way. Top TCA marks to Ed though who traveled from Bristol, leaving at 05:00 having had too much sun the day before and too little sleep that night, to make our pre-event meeting at 08:00. Commendation too to Ad who demostrated the TCA's generous spirit by saved an ailing Canadian rider from impending doom; the loan of a tyre lever enabled him to fix a puncture and continue the ride. (On hearing about this after the ride it was with a faint tinge of guilt that Al recalled someone with a North American accent explaining to him that he though he had a 'slow' as they climbed away from the Royal Oak at Hooksway together; "good luck mate!" hailed Al as they reached the subsequent descent, assuming that his new friend had all the necessary equipment to ameliorate the situation).

Jerry, also sailing past other stricken riders on the course without a thought, finished first in approximately 3h 40min; John H and Al coming in together about 30 minutes later at approximately 12:40; Jon P was 10 minutes behind hampered by cramp and technical difficulties in the final section on the course. We congregated around Jerry who was reclining on the grass in the sun with a welcome can of coke. Having finally crossing the line, notching up close to 37 miles in the process, it was a relief to dismount our sore behinds from saddles. We immediately began looking to refuel our depleted energy resources. It was at that point when, to our horror, we realised that there was no WI home made cake stand this year - the highlight of previous year's outings. We thought of the trauma counseling that would have had to be employed for Billy-Bob if he was amongst our number! Turning to the Scouts burger stand (invited in place of the WI on account of it being their centenary year) we were relieved to see that amongst the hot dogs and bacon butties were (albeit a smaller selection) home-made cakes too. The horrific revelations were not over however when, as we turned with burgers and cake in hand to find refreshment, it became apparent that there was no beer tent this year either! All that way, and for what? Home and hosed the mavericks sought solace in a cup of tea as they sheltered from the light rain which had begun to fall as Jon crossed the line.

John, Al, Jerry and Jon returned to base feeling a little cheated. Their day's wasted John and Jerry packed bikes into their cars and headed home. Al and Jon reflected on the day's events over another cup of tea as thunder crashed, lightening flashed and the heaven's opened releasing torrential rain. Cake or no cake, beer or no beer - at least they were indoors unlike Ade, Ju, Charlie and Ed - the peloton were still suffering somewhere out there on the course, eventually coming in at about 13:45.

Route - Map 1 - South (click to enlarge)
Checkpoints shown as red spots:
Route - Map 2 - North (click to enlarge)
Checkpoints shown as red spots:

Elevation Profile:

(Posted by Al; Pictures by Jon; Maps courtesy of Charlie)

Weekend at Afan Forest Park

Afan Forest Park covers an area of 11,000 hectares and lies to the south of the Breacon Beacons in Wales. Most of this is woodland and is part of the 30,000 hectare Valleys Forest, the largest urban forest in Europe. The Forest Park is a popular destination for walking, cycling, orienteering and camping. We deliberately chose a campsite that allowed open fires to get the true outdoor camping experience. Billybob will be pleased to hear we successfully utilized the Swiss-fire starter on numerous occasions – Ray Meares style!

Back to the biking - Afan Forest Park is renowned for its dedicated mountain bike trails and its twisty, rooty, rocky and in places wildly exposed single tracks which are the enthusiasts (that’s us!) dream. What they say: "The trails here have been carved out of hillsides into 4 world class mountain biking trails; ‘Penhydd’, ‘The Wall’, ‘Skyline’ and ‘White’s Level’, boasting over 100 km of single track heaven" (below, click to enlarge).

Our weekend got off to a spectacular start - the morning dawned bright and clear and we all emerged from our tents to find a campfire roaring and the kettle on thanks to Charlie-man! After a hefty breakfast to fortify us for the day ahead we travelled to the much anticipated start of the Penydd Trail. We turned up with expectations of a challenging and adrenaline pumping ride - and that’s exactly what we got! We started off on an up hill fire track; Sophie and Scott on a tandem, veterans of the trail. Charlie-girl, Jenny, Jess, Charile-boy and Ed (all Namibian Dustbadgers and virgin TCA riders) had dusted off their bikes for the occasion. TCA regualrs Jon, Ad and Jules also made the trip (below).

With S and S in the lead we started the slow incline up the first part of the trail with spectacular views over the forest. The going was hard, the weather hot and the pace slow. Riding with S and S, Julie had a lone biker in her sights and took off to overtake him, only to find on the way past that he was middle aged and overweight, no points there then! After a refreshing break at one of the corners the crew took off again this time with Charlie and Jen in the lead.

The Terrible Tandem

The up-hill seemed to go on forever – Jon was in his element and once the top was reached we were more than ready for the first downhill stretch - aptly named Desolation. Jess, Jen and Charlie-girl took a shortened route to the top of ‘a ridge too far’. The rest took the single track by storm, S and S in the lead, then Charlie-man then A.D. Ed, anticipating getting some serious speed up, hung back to give himself some space and Julie brought up the rear, having no hope in hell of catching up with Evil Kinevil Ed.

Near the bottom of the track A.D called out a warning to Ed. This was interpreted as ‘if you speed up you can jump it!’ and E.D came flying down the hill, faster than a speeding bullet, and slammed, full speed, into the ground. Barely pausing for breath he was back up and on his bike before the rest of us could recover from the shock.

We met up with the others at the top of the ridge and tackled the first technical section of track – a jaw clenching, adrenaline pumping descent littered with switchbacks, rocks and tree roots. Charlie-man, always prepared, had a mini cam on his helmet and filmed the dangerous descent. It was during this section that Julie’s bike branded her with a classic chain mark after she misjudged a section of bank. Blood was drawn but unfortunately none vial-ed in order that the official TCA membership form could be signed in blood by the two founding members (who, coincidentally, were both absent from this particular outing).

More uphill ensued and before we knew it we were at the top of the next downhill section. This was technically easier than the previous descent and was enjoyed by all, most especially Jess who loved the tight and twisty singletrack through Side Winder. We had a breather at the bottom, grinning widely after the rocky, rollercoaster ride.

It was discovered that Jen’s water bottle had become dislodged during the arduous, arm-jarring descent. A.D bravely volunteered for the task after a rider came down and told us that it was only 100 yards up the track. The boys really got into the spirit of the ride, and took off down Dead Sheep Gulley, racing round the corners to keep up with the terrible tandem, descending at breakneck speed.

Ad's desperate attempt to impress the executive committee.

We went up and over one more hill before coming to a favourite of Stu’s – the river crossing. The descent to the stream saw A.D tip head over heals over the handlebars, but not into the drink. After evidence of blood was produced it was decided he too probably had now attained membership to the TCA . The going was relatively straight forward back to the car park and it was a happy group that pulled up to the cars, ready for lunch and a break!

(Posted by: Julie)